"Death Valley Superstars" by the Murderdolls fills the air at the sunny beaches of Cancun Mexico as the fans that surround the ring cheer for the start of the show.

Phoenix: Welcome to LPW Insanity! I’m Blazing Phoenix and this is the LPW Hall of Famer Phantom Lord! And we are in beautiful Cancun Mexico!

Phantom: And what a night do we have scheduled for tonight. Solomon Idol makes his return to the ring, Mass Chaos puts his guaranteed spot in the Death Cube on the line ,Both the Television and United States titles will be up for grab, and Speaking of the United States Champion Andy Savana if he loses this will be his last match in LPW for he is putting everything on the line tonight.

Phoenix: Not to mention that Trey Spruance and Paul Brooks will be facing the ultra-popular team of Ozzy Crerar and Captain Crooked-

Phantom: Ultra-popular? Really?

Phoenix: Well the fans seem to think so but before any action in the ring can start as we see in the ring we are clearly starting the show out with a Cancun edition of the “Money Shot!”

Phantom: This is a HUGE night for Nigel, I mean he’s coming in to face Andy Savana—in probably one of the biggest main event matches of this cycle on Insanity—and reportedly has a major announcement to make right here!

The arena lights go out for a moment as the beginning to Pink Floyd’s “Money” starts to play throughout the speakers on the beach. Gold and green dollar signs dance across the fans as they boo the arrival of Nigel Vanderbilt. After a series of explosions rock the stage, the music shifts to “When They Come For Me,” by Linkin Park. Stepping through the curtain first isn’t Nigel, however, but a beautiful woman dressed in a business suit and wearing dark framed glasses. In her hands is a microphone and a small clipboard.


Phoenix: Who is that?

Phantom: I don’t know, but I’m willing to find out for ya after the show.

The music fades as the woman brings the microphone to her lips.

Woman: On behalf of PowerHouse Multi-media Productions, in collaboration with Fox News, ESPN, and Coca-cola—I want to welcome you all to the new and improved, Money Shot segment, hosted by the king of hosts, the Icon of the LPW, “Mr. Showtime,” himself—Nigel Vanderbilt.

The music kicks back in as Nigel appears on the ramp behind the lovely woman dressed in a nice suit. The fans boo, but Nigel doesn’t seem at all phased as the two head towards the ring, arms intertwined.

Phoenix: Did I hear that correctly, Phantom, did he just proclaim himself Mr. Showtime?

Phantom:[b/] Seems that way. You know, I’ve been in this business a long damn time and I don’t think I’ve ever meet anyone, outside of Solomon Idol of course, to have so many titles. King of hosts? Icon of the LPW? This kid’s head just keeps getting bigger and bigger.

Phoenix: Let’s keep in mind too that Nigel hasn’t won a match in 3 shows! If Andy Savana wins tonight, it’ll be 4 straight losses. Maybe he should give himself a new title, don’t you think?

Phantom: (Laughs) Yeah, like Biggest Loser, The LPW Job King, Nigel Vanderbilt. I like that; maybe I’ll pitch that to him later.

Phoenix: And what was all that nonsense about Fox, ESPN, and Coca-cola? Powerhouse Productions? You think this has anything to do with Solomon Idol?

Phantom: Let me think a second…OF COURSE it has to do with Solomon Idol. It’s not surprise Nigel is out here doing this—this is a direct rib on Solomon and his whole publicist thing he’s been doing since returning to the LPW. Nigel hates it and all the disrespect to Solomon has been showing. Chump Change ring any bells there Phoenix?

Nigel stands outside the ring while the woman in the suit climbs up the steps and opens the ring ropes for him, showing a little more skin and the tight curve of her ass in her tight suit pants. Nigel climbs through the ropes, pats her on the ass playfully, and then struts to the center of the ring. The woman soon follows and then gives him the microphone.

Nigel: Welcome, one and all, to the Money Shot. For those that don’t know me, I’m Nigel BEEP Vanderbilt—aka Mr. Showtime, aka the Icon of the LPW, aka Cash Flo, aka the guy whose going to being murdering Andy BEEP Savana here tonight and thusly becoming your NEW United States Champion.

Fans boo.

Nigel: You little maggots out there can boo until your lungs burst and your heads explode, because in the end it won’t matter none. Tonight, I end Savana once and for all. Tonight, his life, his meaningless BEEP existence will come to a screeching stop at my hands! But you know what, you know what, this has nothing to do with Andy Savana or our blockbuster of a main event. This has nothing to do with Morpheus and his new rag of muffins running around in a new formed stable, this has nothing to do with Ozzy and how much he looks like a walking, talking Penis, NO! This has something to do with events that transpired way back when…involving Jude Maxwell!

Phoenix: Jude Maxwell?

Phantom: Okay, now this is getting interesting.

Nigel: For months, a mister so-and-so has been desperately seeking answers for his rundown boy toy Jude and has come up with dick. But you know what, now that ‘everything is on the line’ tonight I’ve decided to step forward with some information that should help Magic find the answers to the riddles he seeks. So Magic, I know your BEEP ass is backstage being humped on by Capt. Crooked, so do yourself a favor and kick him aside and get out here. Because your ass and the asses of all this stupid fans and the wrestlers in the back are going to know the truth!

Phoenix: Do you think he really knows something?

Phantom: I wouldn’t be surprised if he does, Phoenix. The question should be…at what price is he going to charge Magic? Imagine him using this information in gaining the trust and dedication of one of LPW’s hottest stars! He’s lost Andy, and with the number of enemies always growing for Nigel, he needs a friend.

Phoenix: That’s a great point.

Magic’s music hits as he appears on the ramp. Cautiously, he makes his way down the ramp and towards the ring. Just as he’s about to reach it, the beautiful woman comes over and opens the ropes for him.

Phantom: I don’t know about you, Phoenix, but I want me one of those.

Magic gets into the ring as the woman reaches inside her blouse and pulls out another microphone. She hands it to Magic and then steps aside.

Nigel: Welcome Magic to the Money Shot.

Magic: Cut the crap Nigel. I ain’t out here to play nice or to make friends with you or that…looks at the girl and grunts Euro trash slut you picked up from God knows where. You claim to have answers to the driver who took out Jude Maxwell? Then you better…

Nigel: Calm down Magic. I didn’t invite you out here to play games with you man, because that would be stupid on my part. Everyone knows how bad ass you are and I for one don’t want to cross you anymore than I would cross the boss. The simple fact is, Magic, I do know who ran over Jude Maxwell. I’ve known the whole time, but I never felt I had to tell you about it.

Magic gets in Nigel’s face, his flushed a bright red.

Magic:: You’ve known this whole BEEP time and never told me! What the hell were you waiting for?

Nigel: (Takes a step back and cleans the spittle off his face) I’ve been waiting for the right time. And tonight is the right time, Magic. You see, I’m at war with Andy Savana and I need someone to watch my back. Seems everyone out there wants a piece of “Mr. Showtime” Nigel Vanderbilt. Ozzy wants to fuck me in the ass with carrots…Solomon Idol thanks I jumped him last week…Damn, the list goes on and on. If you want the information I have, then you…

Magic: I’m not doing a Goddamn thing! You best tell me right now or I’ll beat it out of you. The choice is yours!

Nigel puts some distance between him and the enraged Magic. The fans are cheering for Magic as Nigel stands behind his beautiful assistant.

Nigel: Christ, Magic, chill. No wonder you don’t have many friends around these parts either when you treat informants like the enemy. Nigel steps free of his assistant and heads to the center of the ring. If you would please focus your attention to the screen, Magic, the truth will be revealed.

Magic turns to face the screen, so does everyone else in the secured area of Cancun Beach. We see Jude Maxwell walking through the parking lot when out of nowhere, a car slams into him. Poor Jude goes slamming into the windshield, shattering it. The car backs up, Jude hits the ground, and the car speeds over his body and then disappears.

Magic: Still facing the screen I know this part, Nigel! Who was it?

Before Magic can turn around, Nigel reaches into his pocket and pulls out a stun gun. He zaps Magic and sends the wrestler to the mat. Ripping off his suit jacket, Nigel continues to kick Magic as the fans boo.

Phoenix: What is Nigel doing?

Phantom: Do you think he was the driver?

Phoenix: Maybe the driver paid him to attack Magic. I don’t know.

Nigel zaps Magic again before scooping up the microphone.

Nigel: Do you guys want to know the truth? The man who struck Jude Maxwell and took him out was….ME!

Phantom: Did he say what I think he just said?

Phoenix: Yeah. He said he ran down Jude Maxwell.

Nigel: You see, if Magic was smart, he should have put this shit together months ago. But no, he just wondered around like a BEEP retard as he tried to track down the assailant. You see, I loathed Magic’s boyfriend, Jude. That maggot, that worthless piece of shit motherBEEP made my life over on Pyro a living hell and you know what, I TOOK HIM OUT! I’m not a man to be BEEP with. I don’t play games or annoy somebody to the point that giving in to your match request is the only solution—that’s for you Eddie B!

Magic tries to use the ropes to get up, but before he can, Nigel hits a running knee lift right in his face. Nigel mounts him and starts pummeling him senseless. Magic is bleeding from a gash in his forehead now.

Nigel: Going somewhere? No, no, no, you’re going to stay here and listen to the truth I speak, because I’ve listened to you run your mouth about all the horrible things you were planning to do to the man who took out your butt hole surfer, semen catcher of an asshole—Jude Maxwell. Come on, Magic, get up. You wanted a fight, well here I am sweetheart…what are you waiting for?

Nigel drops the mic and picks up Magic. He sends him into the ropes and as he comes off, hits a Samoan Drop. Nigel climbs the turnbuckles and leaps off, hitting a perfect Million Dollar Splash on Magic as the fans reel with shock. Nigel rolls out of the ring.

Phoenix: This is so wrong, Phantom.

Phantom: You do realize that this might be a preview of what awaits Andy Savana tonight. First Jude, now Magic, and then what…Andy? Christ.

Nigel pulls out one of them Japanese death bombs…a piece of wood, covered in barbed wire and strapped with a small explosive device. He sets it up between the apron and the security railing. Finished, he rolls back into the ring!

Phoenix:: Nigel picking up Magic…FORECLOSURE!!! He just hit Magic with his finisher, but I don’t think he’s done. Nigel has gone outside, grabbed a chair, and set it up in the middle of the ring.

Phantom: If this is a prelude of things to come, Andy Savana better be terrified.

Phoenix: Nigel just hit a brain buster on Magic on that chair! Look at Magic, he’s busted open. The blood is just pouring.

Phantom: And Nigel isn’t done…picks him up…FORECLOSURE again on Magic! Listen to these fans Phoenix, they’re livid.

Phoenix: Nigel now picks up Magic, hoisting him up on his shoulders…running power bomb over the top rope through that Japanese bomb!!!

KA-BOOOM the whole surrounding area is filled with smoke as Magic’s limp body goes through the Japanese Death Bomb. As the smoke clears we can see Magic bleeding from the head, back, and legs. He twitches in the carnage, but doesn’t move. Meanwhile, back in the ring, Nigel climbs the turnbuckles and plays up to the boos of the crowd.

Phantom: Nigel has taken out Jude Maxwell and Magic! Is Andy Savana next on his list?

Phoenix: Oh man this is bad. We need to go to commercial, we’ll be right back.

In the office that has been arranged for the Eric Scorpio he looks at the monitor in almost a shock that Nigel had the audacity to take out Jude Maxwell and then proceed to take out Magic.

Scorpio: Impressive Nigel…

The phone starts to ring on Scorpio’s desk when he picks it up.

Scorpio: What?

…

Scorpio: Ah Damien to what do I owe this pleasure?

…
Scorpio: Plans to punish Nigel? No plans at all; the man is on fire right now and besides he did a favor as Magic was being dead weight on the company dollar if anything he is due for a reward.

…

Scorpio: That’s one? What do you mean that is one?

…

Scorpio: I will see? He did not just hang up on me…

Scorpio takes the phone and throws it across the room.

The lights around the arena go dark, and a hush goes over the crowd. Then, “Awakening” by Nocturnal Rites starts playing over the PA system and the crowd begins to cheer. Suddenly, brilliant light floods the top of the rampway as a portal opens from The Dream Realm. Four bodies materialize from the portal and begin walking toward the ring, heads held high. The four men make their way into the ring, and as they enter the portal at the top of the ramp closes, leaving the arena in complete darkness once more. After a few seconds, pyro goes off in the rafters above the ring and the lights in the arena return to show the four men standing on the second turnbuckle in each of the four corners of the ring with their arms held out to their sides, which whips the crowd into a frenzy. After a few seconds, the men descend the turnbuckles and meet in the center of the ring as the music fades out into silence. The crowd cheers for a moment longer, and begins to quiet as Azreal lifts a microphone to his mouth.

Azreal: Finally… What we have waited so long for… It has finally arrived. LPW, say hello to The Awakened!

The crowd cheers again, more of a mixed reaction than what they gave initially.

Azreal: The seeds of this faction have been planted and growing for months, and now finally they have come to fruition. What you see standing before you is an alliance born of common purpose, absolute necessity, and shared Destiny.

Ultramarcus: Truer words were never spoken, my friend. You see, at this point in history, we find ourselves poised at the precipice of events whose outcomes will affect not only the future of LPW, but the whole of existence itself. The very fundamental nature of everything we have come to know and love over the years is in danger; threatened by the actions and intents of a few individuals who have little regard for anything save their own drives and desires. And this… This we simply can’t allow.

The crowd again gives a mixed reaction during the few moments of silence that follows before Storme speaks up.

Storme: War. War is one of the most persistent and corrosive forces that is found throughout the annals of human history. As long as there have been humans, there has been aggression and the desire for violence in the name of whatever vision, tenet, belief, or coveted property deemed worthy of the cause. Despite the best efforts of those with the best intentions, things always seem to devolve down to the lowest common denominator in the end, and the fragile peace becomes shattered as a new War supersedes the place of the old.

Azreal: Which is why we stand here before you, united in a single purpose. We have put our differences aside…

Azreal pauses and looks at Storme for a moment.

Azreal: …mostly, anyway…

Storme: Whatever personal problems we may have, we are all well aware of what is at stake, and how important it is that we stand together.

Ultramarcus: Now more than ever.

Azreal: And that is exactly what we will do. Come Hell or high water, The Awakened will stand as one!

The crowd cheers again in response to Azreal’s rallying cry, and then begins to quiet down as Morpheus raises a microphone to his lips.

Morpheus: It is common knowledge that Reality is in the business of affecting Dreams. The things that go on in life resonate in our subconscious, and these things manifest themselves in Dreams, whether wanted or not. While everyone is generally aware of this truth, very few are also aware that the reverse is true as well: that Dreams can affect Reality. Even rarer are those who can take this knowledge and use it to their advantage. The men you see standing here today have begun to embark upon their journeys down this path, and they have begun to see the power that Dreams can hold.

Storme: DREAM REALM MOTHERF**KER!!!

The crowd laughs in response to this outburst as Morpheus smiles and shakes his head before continuing.

Morpheus: I guess that about sums it up, no?

Ultramarcus: I couldn’t have said it better myself.

Azreal: I could have.

Storme: Hater.

Morpheus: Anyhow, to return to the topic at hand.

Ultramarcus: Probably for the best.

Morpheus: These men stand here with me knowing the power that Dreams possess, and the potential that they inherently hold. They stand with me at the beginning of their journeys, learning how to harness that power. Where Dreams and Reality intersect… Where Potential meets Probability…

Azreal: The limited becomes limitless.

Storme: The impossible becomes possible.

Ultramarcus: The intangible becomes tangible.

Morpheus: And the surreal becomes real.

The crowd pops as Morpheus and Steve Storme clank their title belts together.

Storme: Cheers.

Azreal: It’s like there’s an open wound here. Like, right here. And there? There’s you. With salt. Lots and lots of salt.

Ultramarcus: Don’t worry, Az. You and I will have our own titles to cheers to soon enough, I am sure.

Storme: Word Life.

Azreal: I am not falling for that again…

Ultramarcus: Again, probably for the best.

Azreal: I’m learning!

Morpheus: So are we all, Azreal. So are we all. And not a moment too soon, for time is of the essence. We have been brought together for a reason… War.

Awakened: War!

Azreal: Stretched thin by fighting on so many fronts, none of us could have fought the forces waging War against us while standing alone.

Ultramarcus: But together, combining our power and standing united, we pledge ourselves to put an end to the Wars that others have taken it upon themselves to begin.

Storme: Wars that were not of our own making, but will be ended by our design.

Morpheus: As we move inexorably toward Altered Reality Six, it becomes clearer to me just how appropriate that name is. Altered Reality… It is in the very defense of Reality that we must stand.

Azreal: It is not just brand warfare that we are concerned with. Pyromania has begun testing its might against Insanity, and we have shown them that we will not simply go gentle into that good night. If they want a War, they have one.

Storme: It is not just a War for dominance. While some may stand together and work in collusion to bring about the End of All Things, they need to take notice that there are those of us who take issue with their actions, and we will not be so easily suppressed.

Ultramarcus: It is not just a struggle for Power. Pride always comes before the fall, and there are many who are too blinded by their pride to see that they lurk dangerously close to the edge. This blindness prevents them from truly understanding themselves and the trials which they must face. So many still have so much left to learn…

Morpheus:  And that… education… for some, will begin this very night.

The crowd pops as Morpheus clenches his fist in resolve.

Morpheus: Yet, with all these Wars we wage, there is yet one more. One that is about so much more. We wage a War over the fate of Reality itself. We didn’t start this War… The selfish, crazed actions of one obsessed individual have led us down this path, and now we stand here, ready to defend all that is, was, and will ever be from unraveling into nothing.

Storme: Now some of you might be asking why The Dream Realm is prepared to stand in defense of Reality. The answer is quite simple.

Ultramarcus: It is like any diametrically opposed system. Light and Dark…

Azreal: Good and Evil…

Storme: Sonny and Cher… Wait, I mean; Dreams and Reality…

Morpheus: They are inextricably linked together. One cannot exist without the other. While I may be Master of the Dream Realm, without Reality, Dreams cease to exist and that is something I will not abide. If those responsible are too foolish to recognize the danger of their own actions and put a stop to them of their own volition, then rest assured that we will.

Azreal: You started this War. Now we’re going to see it through.

Ultramarcus: We’re ready for you. Are you ready for us?

Storme: We stand ready to defend Reality…

Morpheus: …One Dream at a time.

The crowd pops at this as each of the four men remove their jackets to reveal the shirts that they are all wearing underneath…


Azreal: Now available at ShopLPW.com!

Ultramarcus: The sleeping giant has just Awakened.

Storme: You wanted War?

Morpheus: You just met the Front Line.

The four men drop their mics and climb back up the four turnbuckles, raising their arms as “Awakening” by Nocturnal Rites begins playing over the PA system once again and the crowd cheers them on. They pose for a moment and then make their way up the ramp and to the backstage area, portal-free...

Phoenix: Welcome back, for those of you that are just joining us you missed one hell of a Money Shot. Nigel Vanderbilt was revealed to be the man that took out Not only Jude Maxwell months ago but now he has added Magic to his list of latest victims. This doesn’t look good for the United States Champion, Andy Savana.

Phantom: Your right Nigel is showing a mean steak we haven’t seen from him before but that is later in the show.

Phoenix: For our first matchup of the night, we have a showcase of talents who are trying to climb the ladder. The duo of Ozzy Crerar and Cpt. Crooked should bring a sense of amusement and excitement to the match, while young Paul Brooks has an ideal tutor in the veteran Trey Spurance.
 
Phantom: Yes he has. Trey can show Brooks how to roll joints and wrestle while high, all the while take advantage of another man’s woman, though said woman had an ill reputation, as was the case with Trey and Maria. Yeah, what a GREAT role model to pattern your career! My advice for Brooks is drop Spurance to someone more relevant. Like me!
 
Phoenix: When where you ever relevant, Phantom?
 
Phantom: Shut it, quisling!
 
“The Adventures of Rain dance Maggie” by Red Hot Chili Peppers blares on the PA as Ozzy Crerar and Cpt. Crooked walk out of the curtain and down the ramp. The crowd starts to cheer for Crerar while giving grief to Cpt. Crooked. As both men enter the ring, “These Drugs” by D12 blares on the PA as Spurance and Brooks make their way out to the ring, being applauded by the audience.
 
Mike Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen. Tonight’s match is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, at a combined weight of 450 lbs. This is OZZZZZZZZZZZZZY CRERAR and CPT. CROOOOOOOOOOOOOKED! Their opponents, at a combined weight of…ahem…420 lbs. (Crowd pops at the 4:20 reference) They are TREEEEEEEEEY SPURANCE and “The Canadian Destroyer” PAUL BROOOOOOOOOOOOOKS!
 
Phoenix: Brooks will start the match with Ozzy Crerar. Brooks would seem to have more of the technical credentials, but size would go to Crerar. Collar and elbow tie up by both men. Crerar goes for a punch, but Brooks dodges it and attempts a sleeper! Crerar tries to counter with a back drop, but Brooks counters with a snapmare takedown in the air. Both men get up and circle around again.
 
Phantom: Well, I can say one thing for Brooks. He certainly knows how to move in the ring and has the basics down. His partner? Imagine The Sandman stoned! Or RVD!
 
Phoenix: RVD is awesome, sir!
 
Phantom: If you like a spot monkey that takes too long to set up his spots. Anyway, screw your opinions, Phoenix. Go back to your job and call this match. You are making us look bad again.
 
Phoenix: Crerar goes for a collar and elbow tie up but Brooks ducks under with a double leg takedown and attempts a Boston crab.
 
Phantom: Interesting use of Traditional wrestling to get to the submission. Crerar is using his weight advantage to fight out of it.
 
Phoenix: Crerar is fighting, and smacks the hell out of the leaning Paul Brooks. Crerar gets up and sees Brooks charging toward him. Crerar with a textbook Samoan Drop on Brooks, cutting off his momentum. Crerar gets up and starts to stomp on the chest and neck of Brooks, than backs off and delivers a jumping knee drop to the head of Brooks.
 
Phantom: That is probably one of the more unique escapes from the Boston Crab that I have seen in my lifetime.
 
Phoenix: Crerar drags Brooks into the corner and starts to pummel him with a number of punching combinations to the body. He backs up a few feet and rushes toward Brooks, but Brooks gets out of the way, causing Crerar to crash into the corner! Brooks with a number of kicks to the chest of Crerar. He grabs Crerar and throws him to his corner and tags in Trey Spruance.
 
Phantom: And now the quality of the match has taken a nose dive! But oh, no, the people love Trey! He was part of the Misfits! Where is my barf bag? I think I am going to be sick!
 
As Phantom feigns sickness, Brooks Irish whips Crerar to the ropes. Trey catches Crerar with a Manhattan Drop, followed by a double dropkick by both men. Crerar spins toward his corner, looking for the tag, but Cpt. Crooked appears to be mentally somewhere else. Crerar gets up slowly and tries to say something to his partner, but Trey catches him in a headlock and drags him to the center of the ring. Trey unloads a barrage of fists to the head of Ozzy Crerar as the crowd goes wild for the vet.
 
Phoenix: Good teamwork by Trey and Brooks. Trey now in control after an awkward exchange between Ozzy and Cpt. Crooked.
 
Phantom: There are few people in this world that I would be scared to see what is going on in their minds. Cpt. Crooked is one of them.
 
Phoenix: Spruance continues to wail away with those punches while Ozzy is in the headlock. Ozzy finally shoves him off, causing Trey to go to the ropes. Ozzy gets knocked down from a shoulder block. Trey runs to the ropes and goes for a leg drop, but Ozzy moves out of the way! Trey gets up, only to get knocked down with a vicious lariat by Ozzy Crerar!
 
Phantom: Crerar didn’t look too amused after that exchange. This little mean streak works well for him.
 
Phoenix: Crerar drags Trey to his corner and starts to unload on Trey. He goes to tag Cpt. Crooked…who for some reason has descended down to arena floor to talk to a ring attendant.
 
Phantom: I have seen some weird things in my time Phoenix. You actually trying to wrestle would be one of those. This isn’t out of the realm of possibility, but it is still weird.
 
Phoenix: Cute. As Crerar looks on at his partner, Trey grabs Ozzy and throws him into the corner. Trey begins to rain down fists to Crerar. He Irish whips Ozzy into the opposite corner. Trey comes in with a running dropkick in the corner to Crerar.
 
Phantom: Crerar is basically fighting a two on one battle in this match. He puts forth rallies, but keeps getting screwed by his partner. Trey tags in Brooks and holds Crerar in place. Brooks lands a well-placed kick to the mid-section of Crerar. Brooks attempts a Irish whip, which is countered by Crerar. Crerar nails Brooks with a strong Belly to belly suplex. Crerar not wasting time and picks Brooks up.
 
Phantom: Hopefully Crerar can cut the momentum of the stoners. Though he should probably find a bag of Cheetos lying around somewhere to help him out with that.
 
Phoenix: Crerar attempts to suplex Brooks, but Brooks blocks it. Brooks with a number of knees to the midsection of Crerar. Brooks appears to be going for the PB Special, trying to lift the bigger man up, but Crerar blocks. Crerar lifts Brooks up, and plants him with the Fisherman Buster!
 
Phantom: Brooks is getting up slowly. I think Crerar needs to try and get this match won quickly to have any chance of victory.
 
Phoenix: Brooks is up, but Crerar with a kick to the Stomach. I CRUSH-A YOU FACE by Crerar! Cover! 1…2…Trey breaks the pin at two!
 
Phantom: He would have been wise to knock Trey’s ass off the apron before hitting that move. But at least he gave it the ole college try.
 
Phoenix: Crerar gets up and picks Brooks up. He looks to be going for the “I Crush-a You Face” again. Brooks escapes! Crerar goes for a lariat, Brooks dodges. Tilt a whirl head scissors into a DDT by Paul Brooks! And both men are down!
 
Phantom: Maybe Cpt. Crooked will finally shake the sand out of his ears and be in this match. Ozzy has participated in this whole contest against both Brooks and Spruance and needs a breather!
 
Phoenix: Both men are stirring, moving toward their corners. Ozzy reaches his corner first, but Cpt. Crooked is nowhere to be seen. Ozzy starts to yell at Cpt. Crooked, asking him what his deal is! Brooks tags in Trey Spruance, who rushes toward Ozzy. Ozzy lariat’s Trey out of his socks!
 
Phantom: Ozzy still had the presence of mind to know where Trey was. And he knocked him out on his ass.
 
Phoenix: Ozzy grabs Trey and kicks him in the stomach. Double Arm DDT! He stole Trey’s finisher! Cover by Ozzy! One…Two…Breakup by Brooks! Ozzy just will not accept that he is outnumbered!
 
Phantom: Give Ozzy credit, but I think Cpt. Crooked really needs to get in here.
 
Phoenix: Crooked is finally on the apron and Ozzy goes right to him, asking him what is going on.
 
Ozzy starts shouting down Cpt. Crooked, who is still ignoring Ozzy. Ozzy, finally fed up with his partner’s lack of care, slaps him in the face, causing the crowd to go into a frenzy. He drags Cpt. Crooked over the ropes and plants him into the ring. Trey motions for Brooks to get into the ring while Cpt. Crooked starts to argue with Crerar.
 
Phoenix: Ozzy has snapped and dragged Cpt. Crooked into the ring!
 
Phantom: He slapped the taste out of his mouth, dragged him into the ring and is letting Crooked show what he can do. But that could prove to be a fatal mistake as Brooks and Trey are in the ring.
 
Phantom: Crooked turns around and sees both men. He charges toward them with a clothesline, which both men duck and take him down with a double super kick.
 
Phoenix: Trey picks Crooked up in a Wheelbarrel. Trey and Brooks hit Crooked with a tandem Wheelbarrel Facebuster/Sitout Facebuster combination. Brooks goes for the cover. One…Two…Three! This match is over!
 
Mike Announcer: The winners of the match. PAUL BROOKS and TREY SPRUANCE!
 
Trey Spruance and Paul Brooks 2.86 APS + 3.04 APS + 1.80 AVS = 7.70
Ozzy Crerar and Captain Crooked 3.68 APS + 0.00 + 0.70 AVS = 4.38
 
Phoenix: Good team work by Paul Brooks and Trey Spruance. With a little more seasoning, this team could prove something in the Tag Team division.
 
Phantom: Prove what? Which team can do the most keg stands and bong hits in 60 minutes? They got lucky against a team with no cohesion. I want to see what they can do against a team like Colorblind or someone like that

Phoenix: We are going to cut to a commercial break so don’t go anywhere as we have four huge big matches coming up.

Mike Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall, and it is for the LPW Television Championship!


Mike Announcer: Introducing first, the challenger! He stands at 6'6” tall, and weighs in tonight at 290 lbs. Hailing from Ostwode, Elysia, this is DAAIIIIIEENNNNNTTTTIINNNNEEEEE!

“Get Up” by Skrillex plays as Daientine slowly makes his way down to the ring to a chorus of boos.

Mike Announcer: And his opponent, standing at 6'1” tall and weighing in at 225 lbs. He hails from “Killa Cali” and he is your LPW Television Champion, accompanied to the ring by Azreal, STEEEEEEEEVE STOOOOOOOOOORME!

“Fame” by David Bowie plays as Steve Storme and a suited Azreal appear at the top of the ramp, heading quickly down to the ring.

Phantom: An interesting matchup, no doubt. The phenomenally successful rookie Steve Storme, against the impressive, albeit unsuccessful newcomer in Daientine.

Phoenix: Obviously Daientine has the size advantage, but Storme has experience and a very big advantage in the giant he has at ringside.

In the ring, Storme hands the belt the referee and heads to his corner. The ref raises the belt high and calls for the bell.

Phantom: And we're off. Daientine goes for a lockup.

Phoenix: And Storme cuts him off with a big backhand slap to the face. That's gotta sting.

Phantom: It hurts the pride as much as the cheek, and I don't think Daientine approved. He comes back with a couple of big right hands, sending Storme to the mat.

Phoenix: Not that he stays down for long. Storme is right back up to his feet and he's laying into Daientine with knife-edged chops.

Daientine answers back with right hands, and the two men trade blows until Daientine steps out of range. Storme swings around and Daientine catches him with a violent German suplex.

Phantom: Oh! Impressive move by the challenger. He might be sounder than I thought.

Phoenix: No matter how impressive he is, that mask scares the crap out of me.

Phantom: That, Phoenix, is because you're a coward. Meanwhile, Daientine is taunting Azreal at ringside.

Phoenix: Probably not a smart move, even in a suit, I'd bet Azreal could do some damage.

Phantom: Forget about Azreal, Daientine is taking his eyes off of Storme, and the match has barely started.

While Daientine is jawing off to Azreal, Storme slides back onto his feet and drops Daientine with a reverse DDT.

Phoenix: I guess it cost him. Now Storme is just laying into him with stomps on the arm.

Phantom: I think he could be weakening him up for the Broken Wings.

As Storme tries to stomp again, Daientine catches his foot and pulls, sending Storme to the mat. He clambers back to his feet and waits, backing up to the ropes. Storme gets back on his feet and Daientine bounces off the ropes, going for a big boot, but he falls flat on his face.

Phantom: Oh that was a dirty trick. I love it!

Phoenix: Azreal just pulled Daientine’s feet out from beneath him, and the ref didn't see it.

Phantom: That was old-school trickery there by Azreal, and Storme seems to be enjoying it as well.

Phoenix: You can say that again Phantom, he's cracking up in the middle of the ring.

It doesn't take him long to sober up though, as he goes right back to stomping on the arm.

Phoenix: Storme is just laying waste to that arm.

Phantom: Yeah, but I think he's getting bored.

Storme backs off, and stands away, letting Daientine get back to his feet. He charges forward with a running lariat, but Daientine ducks, then catches Storme on the rebound with a chokeslam.

Phoenix: Ooh! A vicious chokeslam by Daientine, driving Storme into the mat, hard.

Phantom: That could be the turning point Daientine needs to turn this match in his favor.

Storme makes his way back to his feet, but gets planted again with a butterfly DDT.

Phoenix: And Storme goes down, face first. That had to hurt.

Phantom: No kidding, but look at Azreal. He's, I think he's laughing...

Phoenix: That he is. He's laughing it up with some fans at ringside. You'd think he'd worry more about his stable-mate.

Phantom: But don't forget, Azreal and Storme aren't that far removed from a truly bitter feud. It probably feels good to watch his nemesis get hurt.

Phoenix: Speaking of, Daientine has just grabbed Storme by the hair and is beating his face against the mat.

Phantom: Not a bad way to take advantage of a downed opponent.

Phoenix: Not a fair one either, but it seems to be over now.

Daientine picks Storme up and throws him into the corner, just laying into him with big right hands.

Phantom: Daientine does NOT like Storme tonight, he's split him open! Storme's oozing blood out of his forehead.

Phoenix: He's not easing off of Storme in the corner, and the ref's started his count. One…Two…Three…Four… and Daientine pulls back, just barely escaping the DQ. Storme starts to fall forward, and Daientine easily turns it into a beautiful DDT.

Phantom: I got to say, Daientine is really impressing here tonight. I didn't expect this level of domination.

Phoenix: I don't think any of us did, Phantom. But he's proved us wrong, Azreal doesn't look to happy about this.

Out at ringside, Azreal takes off his suit-coat and moves over to a young man in the front row. He whispers to him for a moment and passes over something from his pants pocket.

Phoenix: Did he just....

Phantom: I don't know....

Phoenix: What just happened?

Phantom: How would I know? Just watch and see.

Phoenix: Fine. Going back to the action in the ring, Daientine is stomping on the back of Storme's head, repeatedly slamming his face into the mat.

Phantom: That's certainly not doing any favors to Storme's head wound.

While Daientine is dealing with Storme in the ring, Azreal slide into the ring behind him. Walking up to the masked man, Azreal taps him on the shoulder.

Phoenix: Oh come on! Azreal is back to interfering in this match.

Phantom: Perhaps not interfering, but he's certainly distracting Daientine.

Daientine swings around, throwing a hasty punch at Azreal's head. Azreal ducks beneath it and starts taunting him. Daientine starts swinging punch after punch, Azreal dodges most of them, but a few connect viciously.

Phoenix: Come on, Storme should be disqualified for this!

Phantom: Why? Azreal hasn't laid a hand on Daientine. It's not his fault that Daientine can't focus on the match instead of throwing punches.

Phoenix: Are you really that blind?

Phantom: No. I just love it when someone bends the rules so neatly. Azreal hasn't broken any rules in the match, but his mere presence is giving Storme time to get back on his feet.

Phoenix: Meanwhile, the ref pulls Daientine off of Azreal, and starts shooing Azreal out of the ring.

Phantom: Surprisingly, Azreal goes without a fight.

While the ref is watching Azreal, Daientine goes back to attack Storme, who nails him with a low blow before rolling him up.

Phoenix: Oh that was a dirty trick! Disqualify him!

Phantom: The ref didn't see it! But he sees the pin!

Phoenix: One… Two… Kick out  Oh thank god. Daientine managed to kick out of that roll-up. Now he and Storme are both on their feet.

Storme and Daientine start trading punches, but Storme throws one a bit too slowly and Daientine throws him over with an arm drag. Storme hits the mat but bounces right back to his feet, turning around and dropping Daientine with a lariat.

Phoenix: Daientine is on his back after that quick turnaround by Storme. He's really showing some durability tonight.

Phantom: Yeah, but Daientine has really shown what he can do as well.

Storme falls onto the ropes, exhausted. He pushes himself off, about to go back on the attack when he stutters forward, face planting on the map.

Phantom: What?!

Phoenix: Azreal just tripped his own stable mate!

Phantom: I guess they aren't quite as friendly as they appear.

Phoenix: I guess not, Azreal might have just cost his teammate the match.

Daientine has gotten back on his feet, and he's very confused. After a moment however, he goes right back on the attack. He starts dropping knees on Storme's back.

Phoenix: Storme has got to be hurting now, as Daientine is punishing his back.

Phantom: I'm still not sure what Azreal was trying to pull.

Phoenix: I don't know, but I don't think he's done yet. He's waving his arms through the air.

Phantom: Is he trying to distract someone?

On the other side of the ring, a fan hops the barricade and tries to get into the ring.

Phoenix: A fan has just jumped the barricade! Get security down here now!

Phantom: Wait, that's the fan Azreal was talking to! What was he planning?

Security rushes down to the ring and takes the fan down. While everyone is distracted by the commotion, Azreal slides into the ring, spins Daientine around and plants him with a choke bomb.

Phoenix: I think we just saw his plan, Phantom! He dropped Daientine with the Price of Protection!

Phantom: The ref didn't see it! The ref was distracted by the fan Azreal bribed! Clever man....

Phoenix: That wasn't clever! That was blatant cheating!

Security has cleared the fan out, and the ref turns his attention back to the match just as Storme climbs back to his feet.

Phantom: He can't just pin him! Azreal just won the match for him!

Storme sees Daientine laid out and just starts grinning. He walks over to the downed man and slaps him hard across the face before grabbing his arm.

Phoenix: Storme has the Broken Wings locked in! He wrenching away at that arm!

Phantom: Daientine is trying to crawl to the ropes, but he can't quite make it! He's so close!

Phoenix: Come on, it can't end like this! Grab the ropes! Come on-NOOO!!

Phantom: Daientine taps! He taps! This one is over!

Mike Announcer: The winner of this match by submission, and STILL LPW Television Champion, STEEEEEEEEVE STOOOOOOOOOORME!

Steve Storme 4.24 APS + 2.30 AVS = 6.54
Daientine 4.08 APS + 0.10 AVS = 4.18

As soon as the bell rings, Storme relinquishes the hold, grabs his title from the referee and taunts the crowd. He poses on the turnbuckles for a moment before Azreal tosses him a microphone, then he jumps back into the ring and smirks.

Phoenix: Oh lord, he's got a microphone. Time for gloating?

Phantom: Relax Phoenix, maybe he's just going to apologize for his trickery in this match.

Storme: Ladies and gentlemen, your winner and STILL LPW Television Champion, "The King of the Indies" and the fastest rising superstar in LPW today.. STEVE STORME!

Phantom: Actually, forget that, it's time for gloating.

Phoenix: Told you.

Storme: But now I have something to show everybody, something very important... Steve pulls a piece of paper from his boot, opens it up and smiles smugly.. this right here is a letter directly from Damien Kross, the CEO of Lords of Pain Wrestling and it says that MY merchandise sales are through the roof. And not only that, it also says that my matches and segments are getting higher ratings than damn near everything else on Insanity!

Phantom: Has that been in his boot this whole match?

Pheonix: More importantly, is it real?

Phantom: Unlikely. This stinks about as badly as that piece of paper must. There's no way this guy gets higher ratings than our other stars.

Storme: See.. not only am I the greatest pure wrestler on Insanity due to my time in Mexico, Japan and all over the world.. but I'm also the greatest entertainer. Every single time I step into the ring, I raise the bar and give you people a true spectacle. Nobody puts on a show like me and I have the ratings and the merch sales to back it up.

Phantom: Oh Christ, I hate dealing with these egos.

Phoenix: Yeah, because you're so modest yourself.

Storme: I'd like to take this time to thank Mr. Damien Kross for informing me of my popularity with the masses; as an Indy darling, I never expected to be anything more than an outcast here in LPW. But I guess I was wrong.. yes, even I make mistakes sometimes - and I'm man enough to admit it. That's the kinda guy I am.

Phoenix: Yeah, the kind of guy that has his bruiser take his opponent down for him.

Phantom: An opportunist. A strategist. A cheat.

Storme: I guess I've become mainstream, but that doesn't mean I've sold out on my beliefs or what I stand for. I'm still "The King of the Indies" and I always will be, but like Dylan said, the times are a-changing. I have been embraced by a new audience, I have become the go-to guy for entertainment.. "The Ratings Spike"!! Believe the hype, my friends, or face the consequences. Azreal!

Storme drops the microphone as Azreal climbs into the ring. Moving over to the fallen Daientine, Storme gestures for Azreal to pick him up.

Pheonix: I don't like what I'm seeing....

Phantom: Well then look away, 'cause it's about to get worse.

Azreal lifts Daientine up, and then plants him with a Price of Protection.

Phoenix: A vicious chokebomb by Azreal, who has just taken things way too far.

Phantom: I'm not going to disagree with you there Phoenix, but if you think they're done, you're sadly mistaken.

Pheonix: Oh come on, hasn't he taken enough abuse from you!

Phantom: Apparently not, since Azreal just picked Daientine back up. He spins him around and locks in the Last Rites.

Phoenix: Now this is just sick, Daientine is all but unconscious now, but Storme is keeping him awake with slaps and insults.

Phantom: Storme is yelling something to Azreal, it looks like he's saying “One More”.

Azreal releases the submission and places Daientine onto Storme's shoulders. Storme grabs his head.

Pheonix: Oh my god, he hits the End of Discord! Daientine has got to have a broken neck!

Storme and Azreal raise their arms high over the broken body of Daientine as paramedics run down to help him as they walk backstage.

Phoenix: Well fans up next we have what promises to be an explosive match with huge implications for the Death Cube as Mass Chaos is rolling the dice big time tonight as he puts up his spot in the Death Cube in a four way match against Big B. Brown, cYnical and The Rabbi.

Phantom: I have the up most respect for Mass Chaos as a competitor inside that ring, but I think this might be the stupidest thing anyone in this company has ever done. The Death Cube is such a hard match to get into. Mass Chaos had his ticket punched and tonight he makes a deal with Eric Scorpio and puts it on the line. I just don’t get it.

Phoenix: You just don’t get the spirit of competition that Mass Chaos has.

Phantom: Oh save me that sportsmanship stuff. Chaos let his ego write a check that his ass might not be able to cash tonight.

Phoenix: Well I don’t think he’s making the mistake you are making it out to be, it could very well be a lapse of judgment.

Phantom: A very costly lapse of judgment.

Phoenix: Well with that in mind, lets head up to the ring and the world’s most dangerous ring announcer…our good friend Mike Announcer.

Announcer: Wrestling fans the following contest on LPW Insanity is a Four Way Match and it is for a spot in the DEATH CUBE.

Before the lights can go out for the introductions, the camera cuts to the back and we see Big B. Brown attacking Mass Chaos below the stage

Phoenix: What the hell is going on?

Phantom: It looks like Big B. Brown is doing a good old fashioned Pearl Harbor job on Mass Chaos.

Phoenix: Big B. Brown is just mauling Mass Chaos and he’s now dragging him up the steps that lead to the stage entrance and he throws Mass Chaos out onto the stage. Mass Chaos is trying to get back to his feet and Big B. Brown nails him with a kick right to the ribs.

Big B. Brown grabs Mass Chaos and quickly sets him up for the Big B. Brown Bomb

Phoenix: What on earth is he doing? That stage is made out of solid steel.

Phantom: Oh I know what he’s doing and it won’t be pretty.

Phoenix: Mass Chaos is defenseless from the attack back stage and Big B. Brown has him set up AND HE CONNECTS WITH THE BIG B. BROWN BOMB ON THE STAGE.

LPW Officials come running out as they pull Big B. Brown away from Mass Chaos who is laid out on the stage. Big B. Brown starts walking to the ring when suddenly The Rabbi comes running out from the stage and he nails Big B. Brown from behind

Phoenix: ALL HELL IS BREAKING LOOSE HERE IN CANCUN AS THE RABBI HAS COME OUT GUNS BLAZING.

Phantom: The Rabbi is a good friend of Mass Chaos. He will not let what just happened stand.

Phoenix: The Rabbi is hammering away with lefts and rights on Big B. Brown and Big B. Brown shoves him off as he stands back up. AND THE RABBI IS BACK ON HIM LIKE A WILD ANIMAL. Big B. Brown is trying to shake him off and he flings him over and slams him right onto the floor.

Phantom: That floor is nothing more than just plywood staging over the beach, so there’s no give to that what so ever.

Big B. Brown makes his way over towards the announce table and Phoenix and Phantom promptly get up

Phantom: I better grab my Mojito, this isn’t going to be good.

Phoenix: Big B. Brown has cleared the table off and he has grabbed The Rabbi and he’s dragging him over here.

Big B. Brown throws The Rabbi up onto the announce table and he promptly climbs up onto the table and brings The Rabbi back up to his feet.

Phoenix: Big B. Brown has The Rabbi up and he grabs him by the throat…HE’S GONNA CHOKESLAM HIM. BUT THE RABBI RAKES HIS EYES. The Rabbi grabs him by the head…HE’S GOING FOR THE BLESSING BUT BIG B. BROWN BREAKS IT UP AND HE PICKS HIM UP AND HE SPINEBUSTER’S HIM RIGHT THROUGH THE TABLE.

Phantom: I think The Rabbi just got Messhuganated.

Big B. Brown gets off the broken table and he rolls into the ring as the crows starts to boo when suddenly “Epic” by Faith No More comes on the pa system and cYnical walks out of the stage entrance. He looks over at Mass Chaos who is still down on the ground and Chaos points to the ring and cYnical takes off running.

Phoenix: I think Mass Chaos just told cYnical to go get him and get him he has as cYnical slides into the ring and he is firing away with lefts and rights. The referee officially calls for the bell as it appears this four way has become a regular match since Big B. Brown took out half his competition. cYnical nails Big B. Brown with a forearm right to the face and another and another and he goes into the ropes and nails him with a running forearm right to the chest. He backs up and goes for another and Big B. Brown is standing his ground. cYnical nails him with a kick to the knee and another and another and Big B. Brown is wobbling. cYnical goes off to the ropes again AND BIG B. BROWN LEVELS HIM WITH A CLOTHESLINE.

Phantom: For a guy his size, Cyn has to hit and run to get any kind of offense in on Big B. Brown. The downside to that offense is occasionally you run into a brick wall.

Phoenix: Big B. Brown is now on the offensive as he brings cYnical up to his feet and he hoists him over his shoulder and he rams cYnical into the corner turnbuckle. But Big B. Brown hangs on and he rams him into the opposite corner. Big B. Brown has a death grip on cYnical as he rams him into the opposite corner again and he drops cYnical like a sack of potatoes. 

Big B. Brown grabs cYnical by the head once again and he brings him up to his feet and he hooks him up for a vertical suplex and lifts him up and begins to hold him.

Phoenix: Good lord we are looking at a power display here as Big B. Brown has cYnical way up in that vertical suplex and he is just holding him up like it is nothing.

Phantom: Big B. Brown has a good 120 Pounds on cYnical, and cYnical’s small frame is being used as an advantage for Big B. Brown as he’s had him up for a good twenty seconds. I think he’s going for the world record.

Phoenix: Just as you say that HE PLANTS HIM with the suplex and he goes for the cover…One…Two…and Big B. Brown picks him back up.

Phantom: Normally I am all for fluffing the ego to say hey I have him in the palm of my hand, but with the Death Cube and a shot at the World’s Heavyweight Championship on the line you do not want to screw around like that…especially against a former world champion like cYnical.

Phoenix: Big B. Brown wants to wear cYnical down some more as he picks cYnical up and he has him high in the air and he slams him down to the mat with authority. cYnical is prone as Big B. Brown goes into the ropes and he drops a huge elbow right onto cYnical. He’s back up and he drops a second and a third. cYnical must feel like cinder blocks were being dropped onto his chest.

The attention of the crowd turns towards the isle way as Mass Chaos starts stumbling forward and he limps down towards ringside.

Phantom: Chaos, don’t do it. Live to fight another day.

Phoenix: Big B. Brown is standing on the ropes just taunting Mass Chaos to come into the ring and get some more and cYnical is back up and he nails Big B. Brown with a dropkick to the knee and Big B. Brown is hung out on the middle rope. cYnical quickly comes running and slides under the bottom rope and he spins around and he plants Big B. Brown with a palm thrust right to the side of the head. cYnical is starting to gain some momentum as he hops up back onto the ring apron and he does a sunset flip over the top rope. cYnical is trying to pull Big B. Brown down, but he doesn’t have the leverage as Big B. Brown grabs him by the head and he pulls him through his legs and back up onto his feet and he tosses him right into the corner.

Big B. Brown goes to the opposite corner and he sets up and comes charging and cYnical moves out of the way and Big B. Brown runs chest first into turnbuckle

Phantom: This is Cyn’s chance. It’s not or never if he wants to beat this monster of a man.

Phoenix: cYnical quickly has hopped up to the second rope and he grabs Big B. Brown by the head and he goes for a Tornado DDT…but Big B. Brown throws him off. Brown goes for a clothesline but it’s ducked and cYnical nails him with a kick to the knee and another and another and another and Brown is down to a knee…and Cyn nails him with a leaping leg lariat. Big B. Brown is down and he goes for the cover…One…Two…KICKOUT WITH ATHORITY.

Phantom: cYnical has many weapons in his arsenal, but most of them will not work on a man of this size.

Phoenix: That is a problem as Mass Chaos is now at ring side and he wants to get into the ring, but LPW officials are holding him back. The Rabbi has been carried out to the back and right now cYnical is waiting for Big B. Brown to stand back up and he’s getting up and Cyn comes running and he nails him with an elbow. Cyn goes into the ropes and nails him with another. He goes in for a third and connects. Big B. Brown is dazed and cYnical trips him with an STO.

cYnical goes to the outside and he climbs up to the top rope

Phoenix: cYnical is going for The cYntrifical Force…if he hits this it will be over and HE CONNECTS. Cover and counts…One…Two…KICKOUT BY BIG B. BROWN. cYnical can’t believe it as he stands back up and he’s telling Big B. Brown to get back up. Big B. Brown is bringing himself back up to his feet and Cyn comes running and BIG B. BROWN NAILS HIM WITH A BIG BOOT.

Big B. Brown says that’s it and he picks cYnical back up and he sets up for The Big B. Brown Bomb

Phoenix: Big B. Brown is setting up to put cYnical away and he has him set up and he lifts him up AND CYN COUNTERS IT. CYN LOCKS ON A FRONT GUILOTINE AND HE HAS GOT IT LOCKED ON.

Phantom: Big B. Brown is in the middle of the ring and Cyn has that guillotine locked in tight and Big B. Brown is starting to fade.

Phoenix: Big B. Brown is struggling to get cYnical off him, but Cyn has a vice grip locked in and Big B. Brown is starting to fade. Brown is down to one knee as cYnical is screaming and clutching with all he has got. Brown is down to a second knee and the referee checks his arm. It falls once….it falls twice…he checks the third time AND ITS UP. BIG B. BROWN IS STANDING BACK UP WITH CYNICAL STILL ON HIM.

Phantom: Big B. Brown is trying for the last dash.

Phoenix: But it’s no good as cYnical refuses to let go AND BIG B. BROWN TAPS OUT. This one is over.

Announcer: The winner of the match and gaining a spot in the DEATH CUBE IS [B]CCCCYYYYYYYYNNNNNNNIIIIIIIICCCCCCCCCAAAAAALLLLLLLL.[/B
]
cYnical 4.53 APS + 1.70 AVS = 6.23
Big B. Brown 4.23 APS + 0.80 AVS = 5.03
Mass Chaos 0.00 APS + 0.00 AVS= 0.00
The Rabbi 0.00 APS + 0.00 AVS= 0.00

Mass Chaos slowly hops up onto the ring apron and he climbs into the ring and he comes face to face with cYnical. A hush falls over the arena as the two men look at each other and finally Mass Chaos raises cYnical’s hand to a huge ovation from the crowd that is cut short as Eric Scorpio steps out onto the stage

Scorpio: You know, this is really touching. It really is. But hey Mass Chaos you lived up to your end of the contract. You put your Death Cube spot up and well fate had some different ideas.

Phoenix: I don’t like where this is going.

Eric Scorpio opens his jacket and from his inside pocket he pulls out a contract.

Scorpio: You remember this? You should since it’s the contract you signed when you put up your spot in the Death Cube. Only thing is Mass Chaos, you didn’t read the fine print. Now being the competitor you are I’m sure you would have signed anyway, but I thought it was only fair to inform you of the consequences of your loss.

Phoenix: Oh now I definitely don’t like where this is going.

Mass Chaos looks at Eric Scorpio with a confused look while Scorpio has a huge smile on his face

Scorpio: It’s right here in the fine print. You went all in…double or nothing. If you lost your spot in the Death Cube…Well the fine print said if you lost then you have to retire.

Phoenix and Phantom: WHAT???

Scorpio: Look Chaos, you’re a great talent…but your time has come and gone. You had a good run. But it’s time for a new crop of talent to carry this company for the next decade.

Phoenix: This has to be some sort of joke. I mean you can’t make someone retire if they lose, right?

Phantom: Having dealt with the LPW attorney’s before, I can believe with all certainty that this clause is legit. Mass Chaos has sadly wrestled his last match and he didn’t even get a chance to go down like the fighting champion that he is.

Eric Scorpio heads towards the ring and he hands the contract to Mass Chaos and the camera pans over his shoulder and we see a whole paragraph highlighted and circled. Mass Chaos drops the paper and just stands looking confused as cYnical tries to talk to him. After a moment, A THANK YOU MANNY chant breaks out from the crowd.

Phoenix: Would you listen to this. This crowd here in Cancun is giving Mass Chaos a curtain call.

Phantom: Not much in this business shocks me anymore, but this one has shocked me. I can’t believe Mass Chaos has to retire. He was having the roll of a life time before he lost the United States Championship…I just…sometimes I hate this business.

Phoenix: Phantom Lord is at a loss for words folks.

Mass Chaos looks at cYnical and they share a hug from sportsmanship and Mass Chaos takes a final bow from the crowd and he rolls out of the ring and heads over to the announce table where Phoenix and Phantom are applauding and he shakes their hands individually. Mass Chaos makes his way around ringside shaking hands of fans and he makes his way up the isle as the crowd continues to chant for him.

Phoenix: Fans we’ve got caught off guard by this so we’re going to regroup and we’ll be right back.


Phantom: SAVANA HAS JUST LEVELED NIGEL WITH THE CHAIR!

Phoenix: Nigel will not let this go without consequence.

Nigel has Savana rolled up and gets the three count in a match.

Phantom: Nigel stealing the victory and you really have to worry just how much of it was the result of the news that Savana is terminally sick.


Nigel: Andy! You’re dying! Work for me and I can turn all of that around.

Phantom: Don’t tell me that Savana is working for Nigel now. How could he?

Phoenix: Sometimes you just don’t want it to end yet…

Nigel throws Savana out of the ring and covers a wrestler.

Phantom: Nigel doing everything he can to humiliate Savana. Thinking it’s okay as long as he’s saving his life.

Nigel: Andy! You turned your back on me and you even turned it on your woman. Don’t worry though because I’m paying her plenty of attention now!

Whore is shown gagged and tied to a chair as Nigel admires her.

Nigel: You will lie down and take the pin!

Nigel is seen pinning Savana.

Phantom: Andy Savana has let Nigel pin him without putting up a fight.

Phoenix: It continues as Nigel is now throwing Savana all around the ring. This is a sign that you may stop working for Nigel but you will never escape his grasp. 


Nigel: You’re still dying Savana and I’m still well within means to save you….oh and did you forget I still have your woman?

Phantom: Everytime Savana pins Nigel in a tag team match it makes Nigel more angry.

Phoenix: What good is winning in those matches if it doesn’t do anything.


Mass Chaos: Andy Savana you are one of the most underrated superstars here so I will give you an opportunity to my championship.

Phantom: A victory here will quite literally save Savana’s life!

Phoenix: CHAOS IS TAPPING WE HAVE A NEW CHAMPION! WE HAVE A NEW CHAMPION!

Nigel: I’ll make a deal with you! You can have her back!

Scorpio: No, no, no this will not due. Too anticlimactic.


Nigel: Your career is over Savana! You may not be dying but there will be no reason left for you to live after I take your title, your career, and your woman for good!

Savana is throwing crazy fist at Nigel in a past encounter they’ve had.

Nigel: Then you can sit at home wishing that you’d killed yourself all those years ago. And that all of this was some bad dream during one of your sleeps in hell.

Nigel is coming off of the top rope with a Million Dollar Splash.

Nigel: But hey if you didn’t figure that out now don’t worry. That’s why I’m here. To guide you in the right direction.

Savana and Nigel are staring each other down in the middle of the ring.
[/COLOR][/B]

Camera cuts back to the beach where 20 PERCs have surrounded the entire perimeter of the ring…the VIP lumberjacks are already seated ringside as the announcer steps to the mic.

Phantom: How exciting is this?  The long awaited in-ring return of Solomon Idol!

Phoenix: You think he hired enough security?  You know those idiots gave me a hard time about getting back here after I came back from the restroom?

Phantom: Well if you wore the VIP lanyard that the Firm issued you wouldn’t have been harassed.

Phoenix: What lanyard?

Phantom: I guess you aren’t VIP…you better keep it cool before I have security come give you the boot!

Phoenix: Please…

Announcer: The following match is scheduled for one fall, and is a VIP Lumberjack Match.

Crowd pops

Announcer: The men personally invited by Mr. Idol include...

The camera cuts to a close up of each wrestler as the Announcer says his name.

Announcer: DJC…Xander Kross…LPW Television Champion Steve Storme…Azreal…Ultramarcus…and LPW United States Champion Andy Savana..

Phoenix: There seems to be a theme with these Lumberjacks.

Phantom: What are you suggesting Phoenix?  Mr. Idol wants nothing more than a good, clean, hard fought match and he knows the guys he selected will make sure no funny business happens!  What did you want him to invite someone like that lunatic Jeff Watson?

Phoenix: You mean someone that actually doesn’t like Solomon Idol?

Mike Announcer: At this time, all unauthorized personnel that attempt to come ringside will be met with brute-force, no questions asked.

Bell rings and ”Rock Star’ by N*E*R*D hits.

Mike Announcer: Introducing first, weighing in at 245 pounds, from Hollywood, California please welcome SU-PER-star…Solomon IIIIIIIIIIIDOL!!!!!!

Solomon Idol makes his way to the ring sporting platinum wrestling tights, boots, elbow and knee pads.

Phantom: Mr. Idol looks better than I remember him.

Phoenix: Even I have to admit it looks like Solomon is in great shape.

Solomon walks by the Lumberjacks to give them all a pound before he enters the ring and demands the microphone from the announcer.

Solomon Idol: Give me the damn mic before I have your ass fired!

Crowd boos as he mean mugs Mike Announcer.

Solomon Idol: Bienvenidos mi gente, the entertainment portion of your evening is about to begin!  Let’s give it up one more time for my hand-picked VIP Lumberjacks!

Crowd does not respond favorably.

Solomon Idol: The gentlemen that sit ringside have my complete trust that this match will be a fair, entertaining, hard fought competition!

Phantom: I told you!

Solomon Idol: Before we start this match I wanted to point out something in my contract for tonight’s match that I believe Eric Scorpio and Ash Strife overlooked.  Not that I expect a couple of high school drop outs to comprehend the small print of a contract drafted by the Firm…

Solomon reaches in his boot and pulls out a copy of the contract and holds it up.

Solomon Idol: According to line 31B, I not only had complete control over the selection of the Lumberjacks, but I was also granted the power to hand pick the referee!

Phoenix: Come on, doesn’t he have enough competitive advantages?

Phantom: Well he can’t help genetics…either way this is a brilliant move!

Solomon Idol: I immediately knew that I couldn’t just appoint a regular referee, I needed to do it big.  So boys, hit the music!

”Black Water” by Symphorce” Starts playing…crowd starts booing.

Solomon Idol: Mujers y Mujeres…allow me to introduce my special guest referee, LPW World Heavyweight Champion MORPHEUS!!!!!!

Morpheus makes his way to the ring, decked out in a referee’s outfit…he gives Storme, Azreal, and Ultramarcus a nod before stepping in the ring.  Solomon tosses the mic back to the announcer and goes to greet Morpheus with a handshake and a smile.

The love fest is suddenly broken up by a man screaming with a bullhorn.

HOLY FUCK!

A man dressed in fatigues, marine hair cut, and dog tags hanging from his neck starts down the aisle screaming into a bull horn.

Mike the Yank: I CAME TO THIS SHITHOLE COUNTRY FOR TWO REASONS…#1, TO MAKE SURE YOU ILLEGALS STAY OFF THE LPW-DUBBYA CHARTER PLANES…YOU BEANERS AIN’T SNEAKING INTO THE GREATEST COUNTRY IN THE WORLD ON MY WATCH!

Crowd boos

Mike the Yank: #2, I CAME TO KICK SOME ASS ON LPW INSANITY!  ALL OF YOU SLAP DICKS IN THE RIOT GEAR NEED TO GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY SO MIKE THE YANK CAN TAKE HIS PLACE AS A LUMBERJACK!  I WAS A MARINE GOD DAMNIT!!!!

Crowd boos as Solomon and Morpheus both look really confused…Solomon takes the microphone back from the announcer.

Solomon Idol: Listen GI Joe…you need to put down the bullhorn and turn around before you get murked.  These boys have been given the green light to use lethal force…

Mike the Yank:  I DON’T TAKE ORDER FROM HOLLYWOOD FAGGOTS!  FUCK YOU AND THE DISGUSTING, LIBERAL, GREEN PEACE HORSE YOU RODE IN ON!  IF IT WAS UP TO COCK SUCKERS LIKE YOU OUR COUNTRY WOULD BE OVERRUN BY ROACHES LIKE THESE WETBACKS HERE IN CANCUN!  NOW GET OUT OF MY FUCKING WAY…

Without notice one of the PERCs zaps Mike the Yank in the shoulder with a tazer…the PERC backs off as Mike the Yank falls to one knee, but is still holding on to the bullhorn.

Mike the Yank: IS THAT THE BEST YOU GOT LITTLE DEBBIE?!!!  THAT FUCKING TRANNY IN BANGKOK THAT BLEW ME IN ’89 HIT HARDER THAN THAT…

Before he could get in another word he takes a club to the side of the head from another PERC, and another follows up with a boot to his back and his flat on his face as a group of 6 PERCs beat him down.

Solomon Idol: That’s right!  I hope everyone is watching this…if you aren’t on the list don’t bother coming down!  Now get Ash Strife’s ass out here so we can get on with the show!

”Something Wrong With Me” by Pennywise” hits as LPW officials drag Mike the Yank to the back, he is woozy but still trying to fight, mouthing “U-S-A”…Solomon Idol throws the mic back to Mike Announcer.

Mike Announcer: And his opponent from Ontario, Canada, standing at over 7 feet and weighing in at 340 pounds…one half of the LPW Undisputed World Tag Team Champions, this is ASH…STRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIFE!!!!!!

Ash Strife cautiously makes his way toward the ring.

Phantom: And what a way to be welcomed back to the LPW…stepping in the ring with this Behemoth!

Phoenix: I’m starting to understand the logic behind Mr. Idol’s Lumberjack choices, he’s going to need all the help he can get!

Phantom: Mr. Idol is one of the greatest LPW competitors of all time...he’s taken on all shapes and sizes, he can hold his own.

Ash Strife walks through the wall of PERCs, who barely make room for him to squeeze in…as he steps to the apron every Lumberjack stands to their feet, licking their chops.  Morpheus holds open the ropes for Ash to climb through, but he declines and enters in on the other side.

Phantom: Look how paranoid that lunatic is…I’m sure it’s the voices in his head.

Phoenix: I think Ash is just being a wise….man…he’s orchestrated a few plans like Mr. Idol is executing here so I don’t see him easily walking into any traps.

Morpheus calls for the bell.

Phoenix: And the match is FINALLY underway.  The two men are circling one another…they lock up in a collar and elbow lock and Ash over powers Solomon Idol and tosses him to the canvas!

Ash Strife rushes Solomon, who rolls over to the corner and starts frantically calling for a “time-out”…Morpheus stands in front of Ash and tells him to back off and calls for time.

Phoenix: What the hell?  Time-out?

Solomon Idol slowly stands up, puts his foot on the ropes and starts stretching.

Phantom: You see that Phoenix, the match took so long to start Mr. Idol has cooled down.  I’m glad he recognized he needed a time out, I would hate for this match to prematurely end because he pulled a hammy!

Solomon takes his leg down, hops around a couple of times, looks at Morpheus and nods.

Phoenix: I guess that means time in!  The two lock up again with Ash getting the upper hand, he gets Solomon in a side headlock, whips him in the ropes and catches him with a shoulder block and Mr. Idol finds himself back on the canvas.

Again Solomon retreats to the corner and frantically calls for a timeout.  Morpheus steps in front of Ash Strife and tells him to back off.  Ash Strife furiously slams his arms on the ropes.

Phantom: He better watch out before he gets disqualified!

Phoenix: You have got to be kidding me!

Crowd is booing as Morpheus is now helping Solomon Idol stretch out his hamstring.

Phoenix: This is ridiculous, I didn’t know Morpheus doubled as the special guest trainer.

Phantom: Again, the champ is just doing his job.  One of his competitors needs assistance and he is assisting him.

Phoenix: Something tells me he wouldn’t be quick to assist Ash Strife.

Solomon runs the ropes a couple of times, starts hopping and gives Morpheus the “wink and the gun” and the match resumes.

Phoenix: I hope that is the final stoppage.  The two men stalk one another again, and Solomon comes in with a chop block, Ash is down on one knee and Solomon begins raining closed fists…where is the ref?

Phantom: Closed fists?  Stop being so dramatic Phoenix, those are completely legal shots and I applaud the champ for letting these two men fight, this is what the people want to see!

Ash is still on one knee as Solomon comes off the ropes with a hard clothesline.

Phoenix: And the big man is down.  Solomon looks out at the crowd, holds his hand to his ear, comes back off the ropes and hits the Hollywood Hogan leg drop!  He goes for the pin.

Despite the obvious quick count Ash kicks out.

Phoenix: That was a pretty quick count don’t you think?

Phantom: Here you go again drama queen…if you ask me Morpheus is putting on a refereeing clinic!

Phoenix: Mr. Idol is in control now, he gets Ash to his feet and hits a standing neck breaker.  He goes for the cover again, 1, 2…and Ash kicks out of another quick count.

Solomon Idol slams his hand in frustration.  He gets Ash up on his feet in suplex position.

Phoenix: Solomon goes for a suplex but it is blocked…he goes for it again it is blocked again, and Ash hoists Mr. Idol in the air!  He lets him go and catches him into a power slam!  What a move!  He is set up for the pin.

Morpheus slowly comes around to carefully check to make sure both of Solomon’s shoulders are touching the mat.

Phantom: Look at Morpheus making sure the I’s are dotted and the T’s are crossed!

Morpheus finally starts to count, and in between each count he is obnoxiously waiving his hand in the air before making the next count.

Phoenix: ……2……….and Solomon kicks out.  Is this how things are going to go?

Phantom: I hope so because it’s great!

Phoenix: Ash shakes his head as he picks Solomon up.  He whips him into the turnbuckle and follows up with a stiff clothesline that almost lifts Idol out of the ring!  Solomon stumbles right into the arms of Ash and he hits a fall away slam.  He goes for the cover and again Morpheus takes his time.

Phantom: He’s just making sure both shoulders are touching the mat, I wish every ref paid this much attention to detail!

Phoenix: 1…………..2…………..and Idol kicks out after another slow count and Ash has had enough!

Ash slams his hands on the mat and walks right up the face of Morpheus, backing him into the ropes.  Morpheus is yelling back and Ultramarcus and Azreal jump on the apron and start yelling at Ash, who slowly backs away.

Phoenix: And here comes Solomon with a forearm to the back of Ash Strife.  He goes for a closed right but Ash blocks it and counters with a headbutt…he whips Solomon into the ropes and follows up with a running big boot but Solomon pulls down the top rope!

Phantom: Great ring awareness by Mr. Idol, leaving Ash straddled on the ropes.

Morpheus slams into Ash Strife with a running back elbow, forcing the big man over the top rope and to the outside.

Phoenix: What was that?

Phantom: Again, great officiating by Morpheus.  Ash was clearly stuck on the ropes, and he helped him off.  It’s not his fault that clumsy oak tree fell to the outside.

The lumber jacks stalk Ash as he gets to one knee…

Phoenix: And Xander Kross is the first to charge Ash and he nails him with a running shining wizard.

Phantom: He calls that the Trey Shot 2K4…D-Fish Edition.

Phoenix: And as Ash Strife hits the ground DJC and Xander are stomping Ash Strife to the ground…aren’t they just supposed to throw him back into the middle of the ring?

Phantom: He’s a big boy, they can’t pick him up whole, they have to chop him down a little!

Phoenix: Andy Savana is asking ColourBlind to back off…Ash is up on his hands and knees and Andy rushes him with the SavanEurysm!

Phantom: Damn!  I know Strife is a big boy but I think Savana just knocked him out cold!

Morpheus and Solomon call for the Lumberjacks to roll Ash back into the ring.

Phantom: His body is as limp as linguini!

Phoenix: Solomon rolls him over on his back with his foot and puts his foot on the center of Ash’s chest, Morpheus is in for the count, 1, 2…and NO!  Ash still has some fight left in him.

Phantom: What an idiot.  The voices in his head need to give him better advice, stay down and live to fight another day!

Solomon gets on the mat and locks in the Billion Dollar Dream

Phantom: Lights out!  After taking all those shots to the head no way he holds on much longer, Mr. Idol has the Billion Dollar Dream locked in tight!

Phoenix: Morpheus is checking the Strife’s arm…he raises it up and it drops.  He raises it again and it drops.

Phantom Lrod:  It’s a wrap!

Phoenix: He lifts the arm up again and…NO, Ash holds on!

Morpheus slams his hand on the mat and begins laying boots into Ash’s gut while Solomon still has the Billion Dollar Dream applied.

Phoenix: What do you have to say about that officiating clinic now?

Phantom: Yeah…well, ‘um….yeah….just call the action Phoenix!

Phoenix: Looks like Morpheus has decided to take a break from kicking Ash to check to see if he is still conscious.  He lifts the arm up and it drops…lifts it again and Ash holds it in the air…Ash rolls over on his stomach and he is starting to get to his feet.

Phantom: No way…

Phoenix: Ash is almost to his feet with Solomon attached to his back and the Billion Dollar Dream still locked on tight.  Ash is up to his feet!  Unbelievable!  He back peddles and slams Solomon Idol in the corner and the hold is released.  Morpheus rushes Ash but he catches him with a desperation Sidewalk Slam and all three men are down!

All 6 Lumberjacks immediately hit the ring and start laying the boots to Ash Strife as the crowd boos.  Steve Storme pulls Solomon Idol to the outside of the ring and towards the announce table where he is able to regroup and grab a bottle of water.

Phoenix: And the fix is in.  Ash Strife is helpless in there and thanks to this wall of security no one can come in to help!

Phantom: I believe that is what we call a plan coming together.

Upon catching his breath, Solomon Idol picks up a headset and pulls up a chair in the announce table.

Phoenix: What the hell are you doing?  Aren’t you supposed to be wrestling?

Solomon Idol: Watch your damn mouth Phoenix before I have the PERCs drag your ass out of here for not having an issued VIP lanyard.

Phantom: Yeah Phoenix, watch your mouth!

Morpheus, Ultramarcus, Azreal, Andy Savana, XK, and DJC are taking turns teeing off on Ash Strife.

Phoenix: So what are we watching here, the showcase of your new stable?

Solomon Idol: No, no, no…you’re not witnessing the genesis of the LPW Wu-Tang Clan.  I am ABOVE THE LAW around here, so the men in that ring accepted my VIP invite because they understand that being on my good side benefits their individual cause.  That and it just so happens that they all seem to detest the LPW leadership and everything associated with it, so Scorpio’s brother is feeling that pain!  But enough about that, why don’t you do your job and call the action, those boys are in there nailing some nice spots!

Phoenix: Ugh…so back in the ring Xander and DJC are holding up Ash as Azreal charges in with a Force of Will!  Ultramarcus, is on the top rope and comes off with a shooting star press!

Solomon Idol: All my VIP Lumberjacks are nice, but I that guy definitely has the “it” factor.  What the fu….

As Morpheus and the Lumberjacks are continuing to put the boots to Ash Strife on the other side of the ring something…or someone dressed in black with a black steel chair emerges from underneath the ring.

Phoenix: It’s X!

Solomon Idol: Oh hell no.

[i[Solomon Idol slams down his head set as X slides in the ring and goes to work.[/i]

Phoenix: X storms the ring and drills DJC in the back with the steel chair!  Xander Kross turns around and X jams him in the gut with the chair and wraps it around his back!  Savana charges with a clothesline but X ducks it and counters with a chair shot right on Savana’s forehead, and he’s busted open!

Ultramarcus runs towards X, who throws the chair at him.  Ultramarcus catches it and X follows up with a dropkick on the chair.

Phantom: Don’t catch the chair!

Phoenix: X pulls Morpheus off of Ash and nails him with a blatant low blow!  He grabs Morpheus by the throat and drills him with an X-Tinction, and Ash’s Wisemen partner has evened up the score!

Phantom: Not so fast!

Before X can turn around Steve Storme smacks X in the head with his own black steel chair.

Phoenix: I didn’t even see Storme get back in the ring.  The numbers game has finally caught up with X and he is down.  Storme, now taunting X picks him up for End of Discord and nails it!

Solomon Idol hits the ring with 5 PERCs and they immediately put a knocked out X in hand cuffs and drag him out of the ring. Solomon pats Storme on the back.

Phoenix: This has become complete chaos.  I think it’s safe to say the referee has lost complete control.

Phantom: That’s what happens when uninvited guests like X crash the party and starts attacking innocent people.

Phoenix: The Lumberjacks roll out the ring and Solomon Idol is standing over Ash, who is still down from all the abuse he’s taken.  Solomon pulls something out of his boots…are those brass knuckles?

Phantom: He was telling me about these earlier.  Those are actually PLATINUM knuckles, and each knuckle has a letter on it…I-D-O-L…he had them customized just like the old school rappers back in the day.  How is that for a little investigative research?

Phoenix: Solomon pulls Ash to his feet by the hair, and Ash starts swinging wildly, he still has some fight left!

Phantom: I can’t believe it! He’s like a chicken with his head cut off, he’s dead and he doesn’t even know it!

Phoenix: Ash is hammering away, but Solomon catches him with a knee lift in the gut.  Solomon swings Ash into the ropes and catches him with a shot from those Platinum Knuckles square in the forehead!

The shot immediately cuts Ash open, but he does not fall to his feet.

Phoenix: A bewildered Solomon Idol swings him in the ropes again and drills him with another shot from those Platinum Knuckles…and he is still on his feet!

Phantom: Dead man walking.

Phoenix: Idol can’t believe it.  He backs up, looks like he is sizing him up, and…JUNGLE KICK right to the chops, and Ash finally hits the mat!

Solomon goes to help Morpheus up so he can go for the cover.

Phoenix: And they’re going to finally put this to an end…Solomon Idol with the cover…1…2…and Morpheus stops counting.

Morpheus pulls of an annoyed Solomon Idol and points towards X’s black steel chair.  Solomon starts nodding and smiling as he gets up.

Phoenix: Oh come on, he’s had enough!  Morpheus places the black chair in the middle of the ring and Idol drags a bloodied Ash Strife towards it and he sets him up for the IDOLATRY.

Phantom: On his partner’s chair!  That’s what happens when you leave your toys lying around kids!

Phoenix: Mr. Idol sadistically looks out at the crowd and nails the move!

The impact makes a loud crack as he hits the Idolatry.

Phoenix: Morpheus goes in for the count…1…2…3, and thank god this match is finally over!

Mike Announcer: The winner of the match, Superstar Solomon Idol!!!

Solomon Idol- 4.48 APS + 1.80 AVS = 6.28
Ash Strife- 4.15 APS + 0.70 AVS = 4.85

”Rock Star” by N*E*R*D as Solomon and Morpheus shake hands while Ash is lying on his back with his eyes rolled in the back of his head.  Morpheus leaves the ring and Solomon begins to celebrate to a chorus of boos.

Phantom: Welcome back Mr. Idol, what a way to make a return!

Phoenix: He looked impressive in spots, but this victory was obviously tarnished with all of the outside funny business.

Phantom: I disagree, Mr. Idol was in control from the opening bell.

As Solomon Idol is celebrating on a turnbuckle Ash Strife sits up Undertaker style, with his eyes still rolled in the back of his head, stands to his feet.

Phantom: Oh my God, it’s Crazy Ash Killa!  Turn around Mr. Idol!

Phoenix: Crazy Ash Killa has taken over Ash Strife and is stalking Solomon Idol.  He pulls him off the turnbuckle and wraps his huge hands around his throat.

6 PERCs armed with tazers and batons storm the ring.  They all start zapping CAK, which allows Solomon Idol to break free and exit the ring.  The PERCs are vigorously clubbing CAK.

Phoenix: The PERCs have dog piled Crazy Ash Killa and it looks like they’re trying to restrain him.

With a burst of strength CAK gets to his feet and hurling all of the PERCs off of him and on to the mat.

Phoenix: And the PERCs attempt to retreat, but Ash grabs one of them by the ankle!

Phantom: Someone needs to tranquilize this nut…someone call in the sniper!

Phoenix: Ash effortlessly hoists the PERC in a gorilla press and drops him into a stiff backbreaker!

The PERC lets out a blood curdling scream before hitting the mat.  He is laying with his legs quivering as CAK stands up and looks out at the crowd.

Phantom: I think he might have broke his back!

Phoenix: And I don’t think anyone is going to get in the ring to check him out as long as Crazy Ash Killa is still in the ring.

Solomon is walking backwards up the ramp with the PERCs serving as a barrier between him and CAK.  A man wearing a mask sneaks up behind Solomon, spins him around, kicks him in the gut and plants him with a spike pile driver.

Phantom: Not this guy again!  That’s that coward Vanderbilt violating the restraining order!

Phoenix: Well that guys looks like he’s about 6’2”, 235…but I’m not quite sure that’s Nigel.

Phantom: Are you blind or are you just stupid?  Who else would spring these sneak attacks on the beloved Mr. Idol?  What a way to crap on the triumphant return of Solomon Idol.

The masked man escapes through the crowd as the PERCs rush towards Mr. Idol…camera cuts to the back.

Eric Scorpio is sitting in his office with an upset look on his face when his door burst open to reveal LPW CEO Damien Kross. Following right behind him is a man in a United Stated Navy service dress blue uniform with the Medal of Honor clearly hanging from around his neck.

Scorpio: What is it Damien, I am not in the mood.

Kross: Well Eric as I told you earlier, that was one… tricking Chaos into retiring and allowing your brother to injure a man on my pay roll is two and three.

Scorpio: and?

Kross: Do you not follow baseball Eric? Oh that is right you’re Canadian. The rule is three strikes and you’re out.

Scorpio: You can’t fire me… I have a contract that says I OWN INSANITY!

Kross:  Own? Fool, did you ever think I would give you anything? I simply put you in power and made you think you ran the shots for the idea amused me. I mean you couldn’t be any worse than Little Red. Eric I allowed you think you had “ownership” of Insanity until you proved toxic to my company. And allowing two superstars to be taken out, Forcing a top star to retire and enabling injury to a paid security guard is toxic in my books. Quite simply you are fired and seeing how past wrestlers have given me grief with their personal vendettas I looked to another area for quality leadership. So allow me to introduce your replacement.  Mr. Shane Phillips.

Phillips: Sir, Please use my Official title.

Kross: Very Well, what shall I call you?

Phillips: Master Chief will do sir.

Kross: Well, Eric you are in the Master Chief’s office and-

Phillips: Sir with the upmost respect Please allow me to do the job I was hired for and I didn’t retire as a Master Chief Boatswain Mate as well as train and break the majority of the Public Enemy Riot Control members into the strong unit they are by being a push over. Allow me to show the child how business is done.

Kross nodes his head and steps back as steps back as Master Chief Phillips steps right up to Eric Scorpio. Eric gets right in Master Chief’s face with a upset sneer across his face.

Phillips: Son I suggest you get out of my face before I crack you right in the jaw.

Scorpio: What-

Master Chief Phillips follows through with his threat and cracks Eric Scorpio right across the jaw dropping the former General Manager right across the desk. Master Chief then grabs him by the shirt and pulls him to his face level.

Phillips: Son while you were swimming in your daddy’s testicles I was out winning wars and saving American lives. You see this medal around my neck? Master Chief cracks Eric in the face again SON YOU BETTER LOOK ME IN THE EYE WHEN THE MASTER CHIEF ADDRESSES YOU!

Scorpio: cough I am a cough God… I demand your respect!

Phillips: Boy your making demands out of me? You want respect then you come over here and climb up these 30 years of service to this Gold anchor and jump over these two stars, that is where you will find your respect. Men… remove this piece of trash from my office.

PERC: Yes Sir!

Phillips: Son did you lose your Damn Mind, What did you just call me?

PERC: YES MASTER CHIEF!

Two PERC Members remove Eric Scorpio from the office as Master Chief clears off the desk of all of Eric’s trash.

Phillips: Now Mr. Kross , as much as I’d love to shit and chat I have a brand to run and you know the Master Chief doesn’t sit on his ass. The boys in the back will learn changes are coming.

Kross: Very Well Master Chief and please enjoy your retirement for faithfully serving BOTH the United States Navy and the PERCs.

Phillips: Thank you Sir and as my first official duty as General Manager I am suspending Ash Strife from active competition until I feel he is ready to return. I will not have psychopaths and Anarchy run wild on my show.

Kross just smiles as he steps out and chuckles to himself as the scene cuts to the ring.

Phoenix: Eric Scorpio has just been fired? And we already have a New General Manager!

Phantom: A national hero and a man of honor, One of the many great decisions that our CEO has made

Phoenix: You need to stop kissing up but I guess we will here from the Master Chief next week.

Phantom: Up next is the Main event of the evening to one hell of a night. Nigel revealed he took out Jude and took out Magic tonight, Mass Chaos was forced to retire and Ash Strife was put on suspension… And this very well can be Andy Savana’s last match as well as everything is on the line!


Mike Announcer: Ladies and Gentlemen the following contest is the Main event and it is for the LPW United States Championship! Introducing first hailing from Houston Texas… he is the LPW UNITED STATES CHAMPION… ANNNNNNNNNNNNDY SAVAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANA!!!

‘Bullet with Butterfly wings” by the Smashing Pumpkins plays as Andy Savana comes out to a huge pop. Posing on the stage, fireworks and pyro explode all around him and his newly won US championship belt wrapped around his waist.

Phoenix: Here comes the new United States Champion, Andy Savana.

Phantom: He may be the United States Champion, Phoenix, but this match isn’t just about the strap. We are moments away from witnessing pure anarchy, as this war between Savana and Vanderbilt comes to a head here tonight…in what should be a bloody fiasco.

Phoenix: That’s a great point. You and I both know that Savana wants nothing more than get his hands on Nigel, who for the past several months has been doing all sorts of unspeakable things to Savana’s main squeeze!

Andy Savana is halfway down the ramp when Nigel comes charging down with a steel chair. Before Andy know’s what’s happening, Nigel cracks him in the back and sends the US champion to the ground in agony.

Phantom: Looks like one of them is a little more focused than the other. Nigel Vanderbilt has vowed to end Andy’s life here tonight! After watching what he did to Magic, I’ve got no doubts that he can do it.

Phoenix: Nigel gets in front of Andy as he struggles to a standing position. Before he can though, Nigel cracks the chair right over his head and sends him back down. Look at Nigel, Phantom, laughing like a lunatic!

Phantom: Nigel’s coming in here tonight having lost the last 3 matches. He’s got to turn things around or God only knows what’ll happen to his career.

Phoenix: True. On top of that his fellow LPW wrestlers are not taking him seriously. Ask anyone in the back and they’ll tell you Nigel is a joke. Fans and wrestling reports seem to be against Vanderbilt too, seeing as early reports predicting him falling to Andy Savana.

Phantom: If Nigel’s heard any of that, and I’m suspecting he has, it only has him even more fired up. Look at him now, waiting for Andy to rise so he can unleash more hell with that steel chair. Andy’s slowly getting to his feet…CHRIST, Nigel just broke that chair around his neck. Look at it dangling there like cheap DJC bling.

Andy goes back down, the steel chair wrapped around his neck. As he lies there, Nigel rips the title off his waist and holds it over his head victoriously. The fans boo at the roguish actions of Nigel Vanderbilt.

Nigel: I’m the TRUE US Champion, not that piece of shit there. (Nigel points at Andy) Tonight, I’m going to break Andy’s BEEp neck and take home this beautiful title. Come on Andy, you worthless son of a bitch, get up. Get up! Get Up!

Phoenix: Man, listen to Nigel! He sounds possessed.

Phantom: Like we touched on earlier, this match goes beyond straps and win-loss records. This is personal. And in a nasty sort of way too.

Phoenix: Andy is slowly getting to his feet now as Nigel sizes him up with that belt. I think he’s going to us the US championship as a weapon!

Phantom: Nigel just bounced that belt off Andy’s face with authority! Christ that was sick. Now look at him, spitting on the title. Man, this kid has no respect for anyone or anything in this business.

Phoenix: You often speak highly of this kid, but…

Phantom: Not tonight. Not when he’s doing things like that.

Phoenix: Nigel picks up Andy, and sends him reeling into the security railing. Nigel comes over, slaps him in the face and then kicks him in the balls—and hits a bulldog out of nowhere! Nigel isn’t given Andy Savana a chance at all here tonight!

Phantom: If you were out there with your sworn enemy, would you? He’s got to keep it tight, keep bringing the pain, and try to wear Andy out so he can win the match. Look at him now, stomping away on Andy. I hate to say it, but this looks like the most focused I’ve ever seen Nigel.

Nigel picks up Andy, locks on a head lock, and drags him towards the ring. Pausing on the outside, the fans booing, Nigel points at the ring steps. He charges towards it to ram poor Andy’s head into it, when Andy somehow manages to fling Nigel off at the last second, sending the Icon bouncing off the steps ass first.

Phoenix: That was lucky! Andy was a few seconds short of getting his head scrambled into mush by Nigel.

Phantom: Damn straight he was. But both men are down right now. Nigel is trying to rub some feeling back into his tail bone and Andy, well, he’s already suffered all kinds of damage from Nigel. He needs to catch his breath, shake the cobwebs out, and focus if he wants a chance to win this.

Phoenix: Nigel is up, resting against the security railing. Look at that, he just snatched a beer from one of the fans and is drinking it. Here comes Andy, slowly getting to his feet…Nigel charges, leaps off the ring steps and goes for a crossbody…Andy catches him mid air and hits a power bomb right on the steel steps! Nigel may have just been broken in half! Holy cow!

Phantom: Andy gets up, but wobbling. He stumbles over and grabs a ladder at ringside and slides it into the ring. It looks like he’s going for the quick win.

Phoenix: Quick? The amount of damage he’s already taken has already been extensive. He’s setting up the ladder, but near the ring ropes! It looks like he wants to continue his beating of Nigel Vanderbilt. Nigel getting up, but favoring his back. Andy climbs to the top and Nigel doesn’t see him at all. Andy is up, leaps, and hits a beautiful hurricanrana on Nigel!!! Wow.

Phantom: Both men are down after that, but that was brutal. The momentum Andy had haven flown some twenty feet to the outside just snapped Nigel’s head around like a rag doll. That was nasty.

Phoenix: Andy not bothering going back in the ring yet, I think he wants to unleash more punishment. He mounts Nigel and is landing some vicious fist shots to his face! Each shot, I have a feeling is for the woman he loves.

Phantom: But not everything should be placed on Nigel. I mean, he did ask Savana to lay down for him for a few wins…what’s the big deal? Andy wasn’t a team player and some of this crazy stuff is his fault.

Phoenix: A woman was raped and beaten, Phantom. You can’t be serious.

Phantom: I’m not saying it was right, but Andy’s got blood on his hands in all this just as much as Nigel. That’s all I’m saying man. Look at Andy, picking up Nigel and sending him face first into the corner ring post! Man, that had to hurt.

Andy goes over to the fans and grabs a steel chair. He waits for Nigel to get up and as he does, slowly and still favoring the lower back, Andy charges and bashes it right over his head! Nigel crumbles like a building during an earthquake. Andy stands over him as the fans chant: “ANDY, ANDY, ANDY!!!”

Phoenix: That was just a brutal chair shot. Look at the referee, checking on Nigel, but Andy just shoves him out of the way as he picks him up. He leads a dazed and horribly confused Nigel over to the ring steps and bashes his head off of them. He pulls him back up to do it again and look at the blood, Phantom…flowing!

Phantom: We knew this was going to be a bloody affair. Andy goes to bounces his head off the steps again, but Nigel hits a low blow! I think that was pure desperation right there by Nigel.

Phoenix: Nigel pulls himself up to the aparon. He cleans the blood out of his face as he waits for Andy to get to his feet. As he does, Nigel leaps off and hits a 720 DDT on Andy Savana!

Phantom: That was a thing of beauty right there Phoenix. Look up there, its Whore! She’s coming down towards the ring!

Phoenix: I don’t think she can take it anymore. Both of these men in this short amount of time have already unloaded on each other. And keep in mind, they still have to climb a ladder to grab the brief case hanging above the ring to win this thing. Right now, I don’t know if either man has it in them to do that.

Phantom: Well Nigel is getting up, using that chair Andy used earlier as a short of crutch. Andy’s getting up too. I think I see where this is headed. Nigel tosses the chair at Andy, Andy catches it…Super kick by Nigel, misses, Andy throws the chair right in Nigel’s face and down he goes! Backfire at its worse right there Phoenix.

Andy goes over to Whore and starts telling her to go back, don’t be here. As he talks to her, Nigel pulls himself up and rolls into the ring. Nigel climbs the nearby turnbuckle just as Andy turns to continue the match, but Nigel dives off the turnbuckle and hits a splash on both Whore and Andy!!!

Phoenix: Holy God!!! Did you see that. Nigel throws caution to the wind and takes out both Andy and Whore.

Phantom: These fans and the millions watching at home sure are getting something special tonight. This match has been brutal and it hasn’t even been in the ring that much yet.

Phoenix: Nigel goes over to one of the ladders and sets it up between the ring and security railing. Whore getting to her feet now but…Nigel spears her!!!

Phantom: He just took her out of the equation with that.

Phoenix: Nigel staggers over and grabs another ladder. He slides it into the ring and gets in. He’s not moving very fast, but Andy isn’t moving at all yet. If Nigel can kick into reserve, he might be able to get up that ladder before Andy comes to.

Phantom: He’s trying. Nigel’s back must be severely damaged from that power bomb earlier and his face is just a mess. I don’t know if Nigel knows where he is. But it looks like he’s going to try and set up that ladder now.

Nigel struggles to set up the ladder. After some problems, it’s up. Nigel starts to climb up when Andy finally rises to his knees. Seeing Nigel halfway up the ladder, Andy sucks in the pain and gets to his feet. He slides in just as Nigel’s fingers brush the briefcase.

Phoenix: Nigel almost has it! Wait, Andy is in the ring. He climbs up behind Nigel and hits a series of brutal kidney shots. He bounces Nigel’s head off the ladder, locks his hands around his waist…it looks like he’s trying to suplex him off.

Phantom: The former TV Champion elbows Andy in the side of the head and then hits another low blow. That’s the second one tonight…one more and Andy might not have any children.

Phoenix: Nigel grabs Andy’s head and hits a brutal bull dog from halfway up the ladder. Nigel cleans the blood off his face as he climbs the turnbuckles. He gets to the top and calls for the Million Dollar Splash as these great Insanity fans boo him like the devil.

Phantom: He hits this and it might be all she wrote for Andy Savana!

Phoenix: He leaps off, but Andy rolls out of the way at the last second and Nigel crashes and burns. Andy is up, folds up the ladder, and waits for Nigel to get to his feet. As he does, he charges and introduces steel to skull with a nasty shot.

Phantom: Andy puts that ladder on top of Nigel. It’s his turn to go high risk here tonight. I wonder what he’s got in store for Vanderbilt?

Phoenix: Andy going for a top rope moonsault and it connects!!! Nigel and Andy both roll around the ring in pain. Man, can you believe that?

Phantom: This match shouldn’t be for free, man, that much I can tell you now. This should have been booked as the main event at the pay-per-view!

Phoenix: Andy rolls out of the ring, stumbling a bit and holding onto his damaged ribs. He’s checking on Whore. This could cost him.

Phantom: This is why having a valet sucks, Phoenix. He should be applying the pain to Nigel, but now he’s taking care of the skirt.

Andy helps her up and we can see her telling him that she’s fine. Again he tells her to go and then heads back towards the ring. Andy grabs the ladder and sets it up in the middle of the ring, but as he turns around, Nigel springs up and hits him with a Problem Child (Rock bottom into a triangle choke). He keeps it locked in as Whore comes over, screaming at him to break the hold.

Phoenix: Andy took too long outside with Whore and he’s paying for it. Nigel rested, caught, his breath, and waited for the perfect moment to strike.

Phantom: Yeah, poor Andy can’t tap out of this one! Nigel could strangle the life out of him right here tonight. Wait, look at Whore, she’s getting in the ring.

Phoenix: She takes off her high heel and smacks Nigel in the eye!! Oh man.

Phantom: The hold his been broken, but at what price to Nigel. That could blind him.

Phoenix: Nigel uses the ropes to get to his feet as he clutches his eye. Oh man, if there are kids at home watching, get them out of the room, it appears as if that eye is damaged. Blood is just pouring through his fingers.

Phantom: In all my years in and around the ring, I’ve never seen anything like this before.

Phoenix: Nigel super kicks Whore and she goes flying over the top rope to the outside. Oh man…another first?

Phantom: You got that right.

Phoenix: And is starting to get up and here comes Nigel, kicks him in the gut, and hits him with a 3/4 neck breaker. Look at Nigel screaming in agony, still holding onto that eye. The referee should call this match and just end it.

Phantom: No way. Let these boys finish their business.

Nigel stumbles half blind to the middle of the ring. It’s clear by his walk and the anguish on his face that he’s in hell. He struggles to drag the ladder to the center of the ring and has an even bigger problem setting it up one handed.

Phoenix: He’s taking too long getting that ladder set up.

Phantom: I don’t know what he can do, Phoenix, his eye might be crushed.

Phoenix: Well it’s set up and Nigel is trying to climb up. He’s half way up, but Andy is pulling himself to his feet. Andy climbs the adjacent turnbuckle and leaps off, hitting a flying missile drop kick on Nigel, sending him to the mat.

Phantom: Oh man that was a fall. Nigel is rolling around the ring screaming, still holding onto that eye socket Whore clocked with her high heel.

Phoenix: Andy rolls out of the ring…I don’t think he knows what happened to Whore. He was down and out at the time. She’s on the other side of the ring…what’s he doing? He just pulled a table out from under the ring. Looks like business is about to pick up here tonight.

Phantom: He’s holding a black bag in the other hand. I can only imagine what’s in that.

Phoenix: Andy slides the table in and is back inside. Nigel is getting up, but Andy just knocks the ladder into his head and down he goes. That’s smart ring presence by Andy.

Phantom: You could say that again. He’s setting up that table near the corner. Now he’s pouring thumbtacks on it. Listen to these fans eating this up here tonight! They want this. They want to see another human being…

Phoenix: Not just any human being there, Phantom, but Nigel Vanderbilt. The scourge of the LPW.

Phantom: He’s still human. But they want to see him hurt…even more so than he already is. I mean let’s be honest here, Phoenix, Nigel might be blind in that eye now.

Phoenix: Andy picks up Nigel and snap suplex’s him onto the ladder. He doesn’t break the hold, he picks Nigel up and hits another one—body and steel crashing together sickly. Again, he doesn’t break it, he picks him up, holds him, and hits brain buster on Nigel right on that ladder!!! Oh man that was horrific to watch.

Phantom: Look at that—Nigel’s left eye is full of blood. I don’t even see his eye. It’s just a red hole. Man, I think I’m going to be sick.

Phoenix: Andy picks him up and shoves his finger into that bloody socket. Listen to Nigel scream. Oh man, somebody has got to stop this. Andy sends him into the corner and hits him with a big splash. Andy now mounts the corner and lands punch after punch into his damaged eye.

Nigel shoves off Andy and hits an atomic drop. Nigel goes for a super-kick, but Andy catches him and turns it into a T-bone suplex. Andy stomps on Nigel, then picks him up and sends him back into that corner. He sets Nigel on top turnbuckle, plays up to the crowd, and then hits a Frankinsteiner on Nigel, sending him through the table and thumbtacks.

Phantom: Wow. Just when you think this isn’t going to get any nastier, they take it to that next level of violence. Nigel’s back is just covered in thumbtacks, but I also think the fall hurt Andy. He’s standing, but his ankle appears to be tweeked.

Phoenix: Yeah, he’s staggering over to the ladder and struggles to set it up.

Phantom: Its up and Andy is starting the climb, the fans rallying behind him. He’s halfway up, but Nigel is climbing up the other side. I think he’s trying to meet him at the pass.

Phoenix: This entire arena is on its feet as both wrestlers meet at the top. Nigel is a bloody mess, his body riddled with bruises and thumbtacks. Andy not fearing much better, I’m afraid. Here we go, both men swinging for the fences with lefts and rights. Nigel blocks a punch and smashes Andy’s head into the top of the ladder. Nigel pulls out one of his thumbtacks and shoves it down’s Andy’s throat!

Phantom: Yuck.

Phoenix: Nigel bounces Andy’s head off the ladder again and again. Andy’s been busted open now. Wait a minute, look, Whore is back in the ring behind Nigel. She hits him with a low blow!!!

Phantom: Andy shakes the cobwebs off, climbs up to the top and flips over, sending Nigel flying over the top rope through that ladder Andy set up at the beginning of the match!!! Nigel has been broken in half.

Phoenix: Whore helps Andy up and points towards the brief case. Andy’s starting to climb while Nigel lies broken outside the ring, body and steel mixed together in a tangled mess. I think Andy’s going to do it!

Andy reaches up and unhooks the briefcase! The referee calls for the bell as the arena explodes into cheers. Andy hops down gingerly and embraces his Whore.

Mike Announcer: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN... YOUR WINNER AND STILL LPW UNITED STATES CHAMPION... ANNNNNNNNNDY SAVAAAAAAAANA!!!

Andy Savana 4.30 APS + 2.30 AVS = 6.60
Nigel Vanderbilt 3.28 APS + 0.20 AVS = 3.48

Phantom: That was not only intense, but probably one of the most disgusting matches I’ve seen. Look at the referee near Nigel giving the X signal to the back. His left is completely gone I think.

Phoenix: Well let the fans know about Nigel’s condition as soon as we get the word, but we’re out of time. The only thing I know for sure is that Andy Savana is going to continue getting treatment from Nigel Vanderbilt, keeps his title, and is now free of Nigel once and for all.

Phantom: You think that’s it? Nigel might have lost an eye in that match! I wouldn’t be surprised if he demands a rematch once he’s cleared to wrestle.

Phoenix: Who knows. Right now, look at Whore and Andy celebrating in the ring. How awesome is that.

Andy opens the ropes for Whore and then they climb out of the ring. Together, their music blaring, they head up the ramp—united and free. At the entrance ramp Andy pauses to raise his belt and Whore’s hand victoriously into the air as the fans cheer. Suddenly stepping out behind them, led by the Master of the Dream world, Morpheus, is Awakened.

Phoenix: What’s going to happen here?

Phantom: My money is on a beat down.

Andy and Whore watch nervously as Morpheus approaches. The two champions lock eyes and then, Morpheus pats Andy on the shoulder as the rest of Awakened clap for the champion.

Phoenix: Wow, a sign of respect being shown for the United States Champion. And so they should, Andy went to hell tonight against Nigel and barely won.

Phantom: Taking a man’s eye then breaking his ass in half…I hardly say that’s barely. That’s domination Phoenix.

Awakened head down towards the ring as Andy and Whore retreat backstage. Everyone in the arena is watching closely as they approach the ring and where—a possibly dead—Nigel Vanderbilt lays twisted and unconscious in a ladder. Suddenly the lights go out and the arena is shrouded in deep darkness.

Phoenix: What is happening? What is Awakened doing to Nigel?

Phantom: My only question is why is Insanity ending every show in the dark. It’s not like we don’t have any money to pay the damn electric bill.

At the top of the ramp a dream portal opens and fills the part of the ramp with its haunting glow. In that light, we can see Awakened carrying Nigel’s broken carcass on their shoulders as the “Awakening,” by Nocturnal Rites comes blasting over the speakers.

Phoenix: Where are they taking Nigel?

Phantom: I’m hoping the hospital, because that guy needs help.

Phoenix: Only time will tell folks, but I’m afraid were out of time.

The portal on the stage swallows the wrestlers and then, once the last two pass inside, it vanishes and the lights return.

Phoenix: What a night here folks. We’ll keep you updated concerning the current condition of Nigel. See ya next time!

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